Love is for Life: Pastoral Letter of the Irish Bishops
PART II Putting Love Into Love



(14.) SOLITARY SEX

122. Sexual actions are actions which of their nature reach out to another and speak love of another and readiness to give and to share; but masturbation uses these actions instead to withdraw into self and to seek solitary satisfaction. There is aptness in the term, "self-abuse". Such actions, when they are consciously and deliberately and freely performed, are in themselves gravely sinful. Sometimes it is suggested that this kind of action is just a normal stage of development and that it need not, or perhaps even cannot, be resisted. This is not true. It is correct to say that force of habit may make resistance difficult and also that the physical urges can at times be almost overpoweringly strong. The freedom of the action may be much reduced. The subjective seriousness of fault may, consequently, be greatly lessened, and indeed sometimes removed. Morbid feelings of guilt about this practice can be damaging. It should be remembered that guilt feeling is not identical with Christian sorrow for sin Genuine sorrow is accompanied by trust in God's mercy and confidence in his desire to forgive. There must also be full conviction that, when one does one's best, God's grace is never lacking and his mercy never fails. Good habits can be acquired as well as bad ones. Good habits are acquired by continuous prayer and by repeated acts of self-control. Self-control in sexuality is a necessary preparation for self-giving in lawful sexual union.

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